The Solution to Guilt and Codependency

Herein lies not only the solution to guilt but also the reason for ongoing and debilitating guilt.

Other than the obvious going against our own heart’s voice which we call the conscience there are other macro reasons that we dance in a cycle of on-going guilt which can cause symptoms such as:

  1. Codependency
  2. open and repetitive confession of guilt to other people as if they could somehow relieve our burden.
  3.  Fishing for compliments or fishing for positive reinforcement by haphazard confessions.
  4. Publicly putting ourselves down.
  5. False humility.
  6. Ignorance of God’s plan to relieve guilt by confession to God and man.  “Confess your sins one to another and pray one for another that you may be healed”.
  7. Ignorance of God’s written Word.
  8. Depression
  9. Anxiety
  10. Denial of true wrongs committed.
  11. Self loathing
  12. self pity
  13. Confusion

Now how does the cycle of guilt, remorse, self hate, pattern take root in us?  It starts early in childhood when we are simply taught that not our actions may be “bad” but rather that WE are “bad”.  When a child is taught this i so many ways they believe it at heart level.  It is a horrible thing to ruin the hopes and dreams of success in a child by showing that child he is worthless and therefore incapable of being good and successful.

We break our children’s hearts when they find our who they are by our authoritative words of torment.  We don’t know any better as it was also done to us.

Furthermore society, the media, TV, commercials, billboards, every piece of propaganda know to man lets us known we ARE inferior to all other humans.

Then what?  We spend the rest of our lives trying to prove it’s not true but it is our own heart that MUST be convinced that WE ARE GOOD and of value to GOD first therefore of value and equal to man if not better.

We take a defense posture toward others.  We believe we are shit therefore we see the innuendo of that concept in every lurking statement made by others.  By our family and by our friends.  We stay in defense mode and push Love far from us.



Even before these solutions one MUST seek God with his whole heart asking God to reveal Himself to us and show us who and what He is.  We must also ask to know and accept Jesus Christ as our Lord of Lords.   Raise your arms now and praise His Holy Name and watch what happens.

  1.  Firstly it’s not your fault you have made mistakes.  God created you imperfect however He has given us the gift of repentance to approach His Son Jesus Christ and ask even beg forgiveness.  We LAMENT our sins toward God and man.  We get on our faces and pray for forgiveness with our true heart.
  2. We show God all of our heart hiding no sins away in secret.
  3. We MUST also openly confess to a human being the exact nature of our wrongs.  We confess to someone who will relate and say “I know how you feel, I have done those things too”.  Or done something like it. If our confession is not received by empathy, mirroring, relating, and caring it could make matters even worse.
  4. We must find someone we can trust to confess to. Not a family member.  Someone who knows right from wrong and that there is a truth for one and all rather than each of us making our own reality and right from wrong.
  5. We must realize there is an ultimate right and an ultimate wrong where most sins are concerned.  However what is sin to one at the same time may not be sin to another with things like eating certain foods or wearing certain clothes, the minor so called sins vary by personality.
  6. Write down all your offences and ask God to forgive them then confess them to man.
  7. Go to a church that has an ALTER CALL.  One of the Pentecostal churches where you can receive prayer with the laying on of hands.  Absolutely you must receive prayer with the laying on of hands by those who have faith and eyes to see.  It will be transferred to you heart and you will be DELIVERED AND HEALED.
  8. Start studying the NIV version of the Bible as the KJV has become very corrupted and it will just confuse you at this point.
  9. Feed the Word of God to your soul while it is still day.
  10. The Word of God is the Sword of The Spirit when you put it into action.  For example the Armour of God. The Belt of Truth is one of the pieces.  Side with truth DO NOT UNDER ANY CONDITIONS TELL A LIE TO ANYONE.  If you do you have dropped your armour and set yourself vulnerable to the evil one.
  11. Does The Word of God resonate in your heart?  Thank God for that!
  12. Go to my book to read about just how t put on the whole armour of God.  How to put on the whole armour of God.
  13. These are treacherous times.  We can no longer afford haphazard unchecked guilt in our hearts.  It could kill us if not remedied.
  14. Accept Christ before it’s too late.  Even if these are not the “last days” as o many Christians believe they are, we are still abiding in the valley of the shadow of death therefore we are always i the end times and one heartbeat away from spending eternity at the wrong home.

Now when our guilt is quelled man no longer is about to use it against us for control and manipulation.  We should meditate every day on God and His good things.  We MUST give ourselves a series of positive affirmations during meditation that WE ARE children of God.  That we are of value.  We go over the good and true things we have done that day.  We do something each day to feed goodness to our soul.  We read the word, we commit acts of kindness, we treat others as we would have them treat us.  WE NEVER say a negative thing about us because we ARE children of THE MOST HIGH GOD.  Therefore we take authority over our words.

We do not allow people to give us the beat down.  We let them know we consider it disrespectful.  If they don’t stop it’s up to us to walk away from them.

In like kind we show respect to all men.

We set goals and work on them.  Goals like “write a book” or “build something good” or gain knowledge.  Learn how to eat right.  Quit watching corrupt TV shows that pollute our hearts with violence and perversion.  And so on.

We must realize and learn how to be good to us.  We must learn what we are doing that is self destructive and ask God to help us remove it from our behaviors.

We ask for the things that The Lord wants us to savor such as Faith, Love, Charity, Hope, Kindness, Patience and so on.  We ask God for Gifts of the Spirit.  We ask God for the Baptism of the Holy Spirit.  See Baptism here.

Thank you for reading along.

Contact Jazweeh at for questions

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